Sunset & Moon – Kristiana Reed

The sun is always setting

and the moon already risen

by the time I am here.

In the comfiest loft

I have ever seen.

Through the orange lit windows

I see fields and trees

bathed in gold,

bathed in a beauty

I have travelled miles in my mind

to behold.

The cushions are squishy

and the couch is firm.

An equilibrium of comfortable

only this woman and her distance

and her closeness can create.

She holds my heart in one hand

and a notepad in the other.

Sometimes she alternates between

heart and coffee.

She allows me to breathe.

Catch the oxygen

the tears push from my lungs

and into the cold fireplace.

There is space here.

I can touch it

and I can exist in it.

I can shrink in it

and I can nurse hope

and fear within it.

I fear too much.

I fear this fear

will keep me

from being bold.

I fear her words

will weigh more than his

and mine and the love

we’ve shared

in such a short space of time.

I fear our discoveries

will tarnish old memories

so they taste like wine

on the lips of a child.

I fear golden light

and the stars at night

are not enough to save me.

I fear I must get lost

in order to be found

but I’ve never been good

at reading maps

or trusting others enough

to let them hold my hand.

 

I fear I am not enough

to save the girl who always was.

 

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© Kristiana Reed 2018

Kristiana Reed day dreams, people watches in coffee shops, teaches English and writes. She is President of FVR Publishing, a curator on Blood into Ink, a collective member of The Whisper and the Roar & Sudden Denouement, and blogs at My Screaming Twenties. She does the day to day running of Free Verse Revolution. 

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