Dear weekly editor,
who I’ve spent decades regarding as a national treasure, I got your letter concerning my manuscript. Power trip notwithstanding, I think branding me a stalker is pure misunderstanding, yep, bit of a stretch there, Jack. But it’s OK. I don’t take it as a personal attack until there’s a court order. Back to business, shall we? If it makes you feel bolder, we can meet in a dark alley like they do in my fiction, which you called “shit-eating grin in an insufferable prison”.
I don’t get it, though. Should I change the setting? It could be my prose. Those characters sure are spending a lot of time in mundane backdrops, aren’t they? I suppose…..if they were tending to the drunks rather than cradling unrequited love, would that work? Man, I can hear the gears turn but I really need your opinion, Jack. Please mail me back…
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